This is so, so well written. What you express here about how you experienced certain aspects of your upbringing maps onto mine in many ways, but you've described it with so much more clarity (and succinctness) than I have ever seemed capable of in terms of what you learned, what your thoughts and feelings ended up being and why.
I have talked to quite a few people who grew up going to Christian churches over the years about my religious trauma and asked them if they can relate. Mostly, they can't. Time and again, I have heard them describe how the Bible landed with them as a love story. Really?! Genocide, slavery, gang rape, animal sacrifice, child abuse, mysogyny, extremism, retribution, vengeance ... That's what love looks like to them?!? How does that work?
For so long, I just couldn't figure out how their brain could have come away from having been pumped full of Bible stories in such a different state than mine did. What I see in the Bible is cruelty, gaslighting, manipulation, vengeance, and so, so, so much violence both physical and emotional. How can other people look at this same book and see love?
And then I began to wonder if there might be some mediating factor, such as how their parents treated them. As in, if they attended Sunday school and learn about, oh, I don't know, eternal *&^%$ torture after death in hell for them and everyone they love unless they can make themselves admire the type of deity that would behave that way in the first place, they just write it off, somehow, because it does not match with the mostly loving treatment they've received from their parents. Their brain just kind of discards the whole idea of hell or punishment or vengeance somehow due to things like that being outside their experience? Their brain auto-discards whichever portions of the theology don't work for them and their health/sanity/sense of wellbeing???
Its almost as though instead of taking it to heart what they are taught, instead of them taking it literally, due to something their brain does for them (i.e. goes with the empirical evidence from their actual life over the speculations of an ancient book), they walk away from even the most hateful, terrifying, violent and enraging teachings with their sanity in tact. Their parents have been more or less supportive of them and they have all these file folders of experiences with that. That's what love looks like to them, how their parents have *actually* behaved, and so, when they look at the Bible, they are able to see the Bible through that lens? (Or, more accurately, unable to see the Bible through any lens but that lens, the one forged for them in the experiences of love and support, over all, from their parents.) And so when the Bible says, "God is love," they conclude (!?!?) there must be some way it's all going to work out? That some how, some way, God will, in the end, be patient, gentle, and kind, as their parents have been?
This seems unfathomable to me.
All the horrible behavior of the Christian deity I had beaten into me at church ***was a match*** to how my parents behaved. Cruelty was the reality of my lived experience at home, so it made sense to me to take the Bible at face value. It describes an emotionally immature deity that behaves erratically, unreasonably, and most of all, cruelly.
So this is the only way I can explain this phenomenon. That how parents treat their kids will strongly mediate how religious doctrines land with the kids.
This is even true of a close friend of mine, S., who grew up in a house with an alcoholic father who beat him so severely and so often that S. had to wear long sleeves and long pants to school year round to cover up the bruises. The father screamed at S. often, too, in anger. But what the father *never* did was ****shame**** S. My friend S. seems to describe having been on the receiving end of what we might call "clean" anger, just anger pure and simple--anger with no mix-in of disgust (i.e. contempt, the anger we see from parents such as mine, the parents who rule by "shame on you!!!" and "how dare you!!!"). S. tells me that he hated his father growing up. And even once struck his father so hard, S. broke some fingers. But never once, says S., can he recall feeling bad ****about himself***** with all this violent treatment. (Unfathomable to me. I cannot imagine what my life would have been and who I would be without shame. It was the warp and woof of my entire existence growing up.) And when I ask S. (who, on his own, as a teenager, read the Bible from cover to cover and attended church weekly the whole time he was growing up, although, admittedly at a very love-y sounding Catholic church) about what he thinks of the Bible, he says, "The main message I got was love."
I think you've posited a very important research question, Christine. Thank you for this enriching and thought-provoking post. I hope you'll use the psy credentials you *do* have (which are fancier than those of 99% of those of the population of the U.S., I'd bet) to look into this further. :)
Thanks for sharing so many of your thoughts - when I wrote this, I was hoping you'd weigh in! It does feel like one's internal experiences created from childhood must mediate, to some extent, the impact of religious trauma. And fascinating about your friend whose father was so horribly abusive, but didn't take a message of shame away -- perhaps his treatment was SO egregious S knew it was not his fault.
I know in the churches I was in growing up, the wrathful aspects of God (from the Bible) were downplayed and love up-played, but I was able to spot the logical fallacies once I got enough space to think on my own about it. (i.e. that god cannot be loving). So I don't know how much the delivery of the message also impacts the severity of the religious trauma? So many questions. I'll do what I can to keep exploring them! :)
I'm also curious, and would like to write a post about, the intersection of religious trauma and neurodivergence (specifically autism). I've got thoughts.
MKM, that is a brilliant analysis of the problems in the Bible! I saw all that only after (1) therapy and (2) deconstruction. I wonder if we only recognize the extreme trauma and abuse in the Bible when we learn through therapy (or some other form of education) what trauma and abuse look like? I think I had to understand what trauma was in my own childhood before I could see it clearly in religion. Perhaps that’s why some can’t see or aren’t troubled by abuse in the Bible--they aren’t sure what abuse looks like, or they assume if god does it, it must not be abuse.
An interesting question you posit, Chuck! I feel like the second one is definitely true - they assume if god does it, it must not be abuse. But meanwhile, a tiny part of them might hold reservations, or there's some unconscious cognitive dissonance (though...guess we wouldn't call it that if it was unconscious???) going on...
Lots of interesting ideas here! It is also interesting how siblings (even close in age) can have vastly different experiences growing up in the same family, same church, same church camp, and so on. It is interesting to compare stories with my sibling now and notice the different things we absorbed from the same people/events. So, maybe that gives some anecdotal support for the neurodivergent aspects of your hypothesis.
My sibling and I had a good talk earlier this year about how we weren't abused, and we were provided for growing up, but that something was lacking. I really think now that I have done so much healing and re-parenting for myself that my parents did the best they could, but just weren't emotionally aware or emotionally mature. So, we just all muddled our way through. One of my parents has grown a lot in the last couple decades. I don't think it is a coincidence that this parent is the one who has practically left the church.
The paragraph you wrote about trying to be good and to feel the Jesus in your heart really resonated with me. I also picked up on (as a youngster) the wrath and cruelty and inconsistencies in the bible. That just fed the fears that I wasn't "doing it right". The adults in my life were really not dialed in at all to what was going on with me. Fortunately I did feel pretty secure in knowing I was constantly loved, particularly from one grandmother.
Thanks so much for your writing. I also finally don't feel so alone in this journey.
That is so interesting about the variation amongst siblings in the experience of both family (of course) and also religious trauma. I will definitely write a post theorizing about this neurodivergence / religious trauma intersection!
I wonder about how, as our culture shifts much more toward a mental health focus and many people become more aware of both what they can do for themselves / their kids to be healthy but also what was lacking in their own childhood... how do I say this. I wonder if a lot of these elements were missing for most people in the past, but our culture is evolving enough where we can see how to do better now. Or maybe our hyperindividualism and the influence of conservative religion (which has also been around a long, long time) exacerbates the problem (e.g. not doing great meeting kids' emotional needs). Anyways, that's a tangent, but something I think about regularly.
I'm glad to know you have felt similarly and that we can share experiences like this across the internet! I'm glad you're here!
I'm the second of 4, and constantly realizing how different our experiences were. I've talked around the subject a little bit with two of them, but not plainly, and wouldn't dare bring it up with the other. I'm hoping someday we all grow enough to talk clearly about our childhoods, but we're just not there yet.
“So I learned to hate the ways I fell short, but struggled to have that all-important emotional connection with God, the ever-existing presence of Jesus in my heart that I could “feel” at all times. I was never doing or feeling enough, and that weird nexus of emotion-driven yet intellectualizing evangelicalism was my perfect storm of learning to despise the teachings I came from.” Yes! I relate to this so much.
*"So now I was being asked to connect emotionally with God — a skill I didn’t really have — and what I did know was how to “behave well,” but this was both not enough (purity culture! obedience! submission!) and something I shouldn’t be proud of (“everyone is a sinner!”)."*
This. My church (church of Christ, if you're curious) is a notably intellectualized faith, which definitely played to my strengths. The youth group, on the other hand, was all over having that "personal relationship with Jesus." As an undiagnosed (probably) autistic and (definitely) ADHD and OCD teenager, this did not help me fit in any better. I definitely frustrated the adults in my life by being a "star pupil" religiously in so many ways, but avoiding all the extra youth group activities like the plague, when I "could have so much good influence there!" Also, then I could have a "real" Christian friend at school, rather than the Catholic and non-denominational friend I hung out with at our Christian school.
This contradiction between doing everything right/believing so the right things (employed in worship and by most adults) and being friends with Jesus (everybody involved in youth group plus a few odd ones out) really bothered me. For good or ill, my parents heavily implied the relationship emphasis was just an excuse for not obeying everything and not taking the Bible seriously. I, of course, believed them, and sat through the youth classes with a definite holier-than-thou attitude, and, somehow, never really made friends there. Can't imagine why.
And my parents, especially my mom, *hated* that I wasn't best friends with them.
Sigh. I think I've vented enough for one extremely long comment. :)
So interesting about the CoC main church vs the youth group! Definitely familiar with the CoC ... they're especially into the "only our [NOT a denomination, no way!] tradition is the real church!", yeah? I love your paragraph about the contradiction. And your parents being disappointed you weren't friends with the kids they told you were not taking the Bible seriously enough... good heavens.
Ugh I had so many troubles fitting into our church youth group. Was never a cool kid ever, but what you're saying makes me think about how I also couldn't manifest all the "right" emotion I was "supposed" to be having in youth group.
I appreciate your venting long comment. :) I'm glad you're here!
Yep, that's the church of Christ. Lots of them refuse to even label anyone outside the group as "Christian." Everyone from Catholic to Presbyterian to Pentecostal to non-denominational is, at best, a deluded "denominationalist."
Full disclosure in here - I'm actually completely uncertain about what I believe religiously/spiritually right now. Some days I think Christianity is a hopeless cause. Other days I think that's throwing the baby out with the bathwater.
My husband - who is super supportive and on his own somewhat similar journey - is a minister. This is great in some ways, but it means that our livelihood (do people even use that word anymore?) is dependent on the church. Since family is such a huge focus for them, this means I am attending a super conservative church three times a week while I wonder about life, the universe, and everything, and we ponder what comes next. (What do you do when all your training is in preaching? Even with a Masters, those credentials don't exactly transfer well.)
I'm also still in various levels of contact with my parents and siblings, all church leaders in one way or another.
In other words, my childhood and religious trauma are very wrapped up in one another, and are still actively occurring.
I really appreciate your substack. You provide lots of information and well thought out commentary, you sometimes say the quiet part out loud 😆, and, probably most importantly, have been part of finding a bit of community online, to know I'm not alone. So thanks.
And now I wonder if these things have a character limit. I feel like I must be getting close!
Laura, TBH I feel the same way about not sure about hopeless cause / baby and bathwater thing for Christianity! Very much pendulate between those two, but also firmly believe it can still do good... just not sure if it's for me?
Wow, wow, ok. So your husband is a minister in the CoC? Whew! That's a lot! I'm glad he's somewhat on a similar journey, but whew that's SO hard when your livelihood (I don't know who else does, but I definitely use that word!) is dependent on the church! I would be SO stressed in your situation and definitely feel for you.
I'm so, so glad you're here and we can share a bit of online community. I'll invite you, if you want, to shoot me an email sometime (christinegreenwald@substack.com goes straight to my inbox) if you want to talk things out / just have a listening ear. I've made several online friends from the Substack (etc) spaces and I genuinely enjoy the connections outside the comment sections. :) It can be a lonely world out there, and we need each other!
Thank you for your writing, Christine! Yes, intersection of religious trauma and childhood trauma is so intense! It can help with healing when parents change and become better parents over time, yet this can make it hard to deal with childhood trauma, especially when knowing that others had trauma that was "so much worse". I'm finding the YouTubes by Patrick Teahan, LICSW, are helpful resources and I'm sharing them with some people in my life who need gentle information about their family trauma and the impact it has for them as adults.
Thanks, Barb! I agree that our own parents' growth helps our healing process -- and is painful in reverse when they won't grow! I will have to check out those videos. I just took a look at his website, and the RRP model he uses looks good - so many ways to help people heal and reparent the inner child!
Hi, Christine. A friend was asking the other day if Christianity could be considered a cult. I'm sure I remember you addressing this question in one of your posts. Could you send me the link?
Thankfully, my childhood trauma did not include religious trauma (which came in adulthood and was self-inflicted). But your explanation is so crystal clear, Christine, of how the two kinds of trauma can come together as a double whammy for kids in religious families. I could feel the inner conflicts. Really fine writing!
This is so, so well written. What you express here about how you experienced certain aspects of your upbringing maps onto mine in many ways, but you've described it with so much more clarity (and succinctness) than I have ever seemed capable of in terms of what you learned, what your thoughts and feelings ended up being and why.
I have talked to quite a few people who grew up going to Christian churches over the years about my religious trauma and asked them if they can relate. Mostly, they can't. Time and again, I have heard them describe how the Bible landed with them as a love story. Really?! Genocide, slavery, gang rape, animal sacrifice, child abuse, mysogyny, extremism, retribution, vengeance ... That's what love looks like to them?!? How does that work?
For so long, I just couldn't figure out how their brain could have come away from having been pumped full of Bible stories in such a different state than mine did. What I see in the Bible is cruelty, gaslighting, manipulation, vengeance, and so, so, so much violence both physical and emotional. How can other people look at this same book and see love?
And then I began to wonder if there might be some mediating factor, such as how their parents treated them. As in, if they attended Sunday school and learn about, oh, I don't know, eternal *&^%$ torture after death in hell for them and everyone they love unless they can make themselves admire the type of deity that would behave that way in the first place, they just write it off, somehow, because it does not match with the mostly loving treatment they've received from their parents. Their brain just kind of discards the whole idea of hell or punishment or vengeance somehow due to things like that being outside their experience? Their brain auto-discards whichever portions of the theology don't work for them and their health/sanity/sense of wellbeing???
Its almost as though instead of taking it to heart what they are taught, instead of them taking it literally, due to something their brain does for them (i.e. goes with the empirical evidence from their actual life over the speculations of an ancient book), they walk away from even the most hateful, terrifying, violent and enraging teachings with their sanity in tact. Their parents have been more or less supportive of them and they have all these file folders of experiences with that. That's what love looks like to them, how their parents have *actually* behaved, and so, when they look at the Bible, they are able to see the Bible through that lens? (Or, more accurately, unable to see the Bible through any lens but that lens, the one forged for them in the experiences of love and support, over all, from their parents.) And so when the Bible says, "God is love," they conclude (!?!?) there must be some way it's all going to work out? That some how, some way, God will, in the end, be patient, gentle, and kind, as their parents have been?
This seems unfathomable to me.
All the horrible behavior of the Christian deity I had beaten into me at church ***was a match*** to how my parents behaved. Cruelty was the reality of my lived experience at home, so it made sense to me to take the Bible at face value. It describes an emotionally immature deity that behaves erratically, unreasonably, and most of all, cruelly.
So this is the only way I can explain this phenomenon. That how parents treat their kids will strongly mediate how religious doctrines land with the kids.
This is even true of a close friend of mine, S., who grew up in a house with an alcoholic father who beat him so severely and so often that S. had to wear long sleeves and long pants to school year round to cover up the bruises. The father screamed at S. often, too, in anger. But what the father *never* did was ****shame**** S. My friend S. seems to describe having been on the receiving end of what we might call "clean" anger, just anger pure and simple--anger with no mix-in of disgust (i.e. contempt, the anger we see from parents such as mine, the parents who rule by "shame on you!!!" and "how dare you!!!"). S. tells me that he hated his father growing up. And even once struck his father so hard, S. broke some fingers. But never once, says S., can he recall feeling bad ****about himself***** with all this violent treatment. (Unfathomable to me. I cannot imagine what my life would have been and who I would be without shame. It was the warp and woof of my entire existence growing up.) And when I ask S. (who, on his own, as a teenager, read the Bible from cover to cover and attended church weekly the whole time he was growing up, although, admittedly at a very love-y sounding Catholic church) about what he thinks of the Bible, he says, "The main message I got was love."
I think you've posited a very important research question, Christine. Thank you for this enriching and thought-provoking post. I hope you'll use the psy credentials you *do* have (which are fancier than those of 99% of those of the population of the U.S., I'd bet) to look into this further. :)
Thanks for sharing so many of your thoughts - when I wrote this, I was hoping you'd weigh in! It does feel like one's internal experiences created from childhood must mediate, to some extent, the impact of religious trauma. And fascinating about your friend whose father was so horribly abusive, but didn't take a message of shame away -- perhaps his treatment was SO egregious S knew it was not his fault.
I know in the churches I was in growing up, the wrathful aspects of God (from the Bible) were downplayed and love up-played, but I was able to spot the logical fallacies once I got enough space to think on my own about it. (i.e. that god cannot be loving). So I don't know how much the delivery of the message also impacts the severity of the religious trauma? So many questions. I'll do what I can to keep exploring them! :)
I'm also curious, and would like to write a post about, the intersection of religious trauma and neurodivergence (specifically autism). I've got thoughts.
You should definitely write that post on religious trauma and neurodivergence! I'm excited!
MKM, that is a brilliant analysis of the problems in the Bible! I saw all that only after (1) therapy and (2) deconstruction. I wonder if we only recognize the extreme trauma and abuse in the Bible when we learn through therapy (or some other form of education) what trauma and abuse look like? I think I had to understand what trauma was in my own childhood before I could see it clearly in religion. Perhaps that’s why some can’t see or aren’t troubled by abuse in the Bible--they aren’t sure what abuse looks like, or they assume if god does it, it must not be abuse.
An interesting question you posit, Chuck! I feel like the second one is definitely true - they assume if god does it, it must not be abuse. But meanwhile, a tiny part of them might hold reservations, or there's some unconscious cognitive dissonance (though...guess we wouldn't call it that if it was unconscious???) going on...
Lots of interesting ideas here! It is also interesting how siblings (even close in age) can have vastly different experiences growing up in the same family, same church, same church camp, and so on. It is interesting to compare stories with my sibling now and notice the different things we absorbed from the same people/events. So, maybe that gives some anecdotal support for the neurodivergent aspects of your hypothesis.
My sibling and I had a good talk earlier this year about how we weren't abused, and we were provided for growing up, but that something was lacking. I really think now that I have done so much healing and re-parenting for myself that my parents did the best they could, but just weren't emotionally aware or emotionally mature. So, we just all muddled our way through. One of my parents has grown a lot in the last couple decades. I don't think it is a coincidence that this parent is the one who has practically left the church.
The paragraph you wrote about trying to be good and to feel the Jesus in your heart really resonated with me. I also picked up on (as a youngster) the wrath and cruelty and inconsistencies in the bible. That just fed the fears that I wasn't "doing it right". The adults in my life were really not dialed in at all to what was going on with me. Fortunately I did feel pretty secure in knowing I was constantly loved, particularly from one grandmother.
Thanks so much for your writing. I also finally don't feel so alone in this journey.
That is so interesting about the variation amongst siblings in the experience of both family (of course) and also religious trauma. I will definitely write a post theorizing about this neurodivergence / religious trauma intersection!
I wonder about how, as our culture shifts much more toward a mental health focus and many people become more aware of both what they can do for themselves / their kids to be healthy but also what was lacking in their own childhood... how do I say this. I wonder if a lot of these elements were missing for most people in the past, but our culture is evolving enough where we can see how to do better now. Or maybe our hyperindividualism and the influence of conservative religion (which has also been around a long, long time) exacerbates the problem (e.g. not doing great meeting kids' emotional needs). Anyways, that's a tangent, but something I think about regularly.
I'm glad to know you have felt similarly and that we can share experiences like this across the internet! I'm glad you're here!
I'm the second of 4, and constantly realizing how different our experiences were. I've talked around the subject a little bit with two of them, but not plainly, and wouldn't dare bring it up with the other. I'm hoping someday we all grow enough to talk clearly about our childhoods, but we're just not there yet.
“So I learned to hate the ways I fell short, but struggled to have that all-important emotional connection with God, the ever-existing presence of Jesus in my heart that I could “feel” at all times. I was never doing or feeling enough, and that weird nexus of emotion-driven yet intellectualizing evangelicalism was my perfect storm of learning to despise the teachings I came from.” Yes! I relate to this so much.
Thanks for articulating what you’re learning!
*"So now I was being asked to connect emotionally with God — a skill I didn’t really have — and what I did know was how to “behave well,” but this was both not enough (purity culture! obedience! submission!) and something I shouldn’t be proud of (“everyone is a sinner!”)."*
This. My church (church of Christ, if you're curious) is a notably intellectualized faith, which definitely played to my strengths. The youth group, on the other hand, was all over having that "personal relationship with Jesus." As an undiagnosed (probably) autistic and (definitely) ADHD and OCD teenager, this did not help me fit in any better. I definitely frustrated the adults in my life by being a "star pupil" religiously in so many ways, but avoiding all the extra youth group activities like the plague, when I "could have so much good influence there!" Also, then I could have a "real" Christian friend at school, rather than the Catholic and non-denominational friend I hung out with at our Christian school.
This contradiction between doing everything right/believing so the right things (employed in worship and by most adults) and being friends with Jesus (everybody involved in youth group plus a few odd ones out) really bothered me. For good or ill, my parents heavily implied the relationship emphasis was just an excuse for not obeying everything and not taking the Bible seriously. I, of course, believed them, and sat through the youth classes with a definite holier-than-thou attitude, and, somehow, never really made friends there. Can't imagine why.
And my parents, especially my mom, *hated* that I wasn't best friends with them.
Sigh. I think I've vented enough for one extremely long comment. :)
So interesting about the CoC main church vs the youth group! Definitely familiar with the CoC ... they're especially into the "only our [NOT a denomination, no way!] tradition is the real church!", yeah? I love your paragraph about the contradiction. And your parents being disappointed you weren't friends with the kids they told you were not taking the Bible seriously enough... good heavens.
Ugh I had so many troubles fitting into our church youth group. Was never a cool kid ever, but what you're saying makes me think about how I also couldn't manifest all the "right" emotion I was "supposed" to be having in youth group.
I appreciate your venting long comment. :) I'm glad you're here!
Yep, that's the church of Christ. Lots of them refuse to even label anyone outside the group as "Christian." Everyone from Catholic to Presbyterian to Pentecostal to non-denominational is, at best, a deluded "denominationalist."
Full disclosure in here - I'm actually completely uncertain about what I believe religiously/spiritually right now. Some days I think Christianity is a hopeless cause. Other days I think that's throwing the baby out with the bathwater.
My husband - who is super supportive and on his own somewhat similar journey - is a minister. This is great in some ways, but it means that our livelihood (do people even use that word anymore?) is dependent on the church. Since family is such a huge focus for them, this means I am attending a super conservative church three times a week while I wonder about life, the universe, and everything, and we ponder what comes next. (What do you do when all your training is in preaching? Even with a Masters, those credentials don't exactly transfer well.)
I'm also still in various levels of contact with my parents and siblings, all church leaders in one way or another.
In other words, my childhood and religious trauma are very wrapped up in one another, and are still actively occurring.
I really appreciate your substack. You provide lots of information and well thought out commentary, you sometimes say the quiet part out loud 😆, and, probably most importantly, have been part of finding a bit of community online, to know I'm not alone. So thanks.
And now I wonder if these things have a character limit. I feel like I must be getting close!
Laura, TBH I feel the same way about not sure about hopeless cause / baby and bathwater thing for Christianity! Very much pendulate between those two, but also firmly believe it can still do good... just not sure if it's for me?
Wow, wow, ok. So your husband is a minister in the CoC? Whew! That's a lot! I'm glad he's somewhat on a similar journey, but whew that's SO hard when your livelihood (I don't know who else does, but I definitely use that word!) is dependent on the church! I would be SO stressed in your situation and definitely feel for you.
I'm so, so glad you're here and we can share a bit of online community. I'll invite you, if you want, to shoot me an email sometime (christinegreenwald@substack.com goes straight to my inbox) if you want to talk things out / just have a listening ear. I've made several online friends from the Substack (etc) spaces and I genuinely enjoy the connections outside the comment sections. :) It can be a lonely world out there, and we need each other!
Yes! So much good stuff here and very representative of my own experience.
Thank you for your writing, Christine! Yes, intersection of religious trauma and childhood trauma is so intense! It can help with healing when parents change and become better parents over time, yet this can make it hard to deal with childhood trauma, especially when knowing that others had trauma that was "so much worse". I'm finding the YouTubes by Patrick Teahan, LICSW, are helpful resources and I'm sharing them with some people in my life who need gentle information about their family trauma and the impact it has for them as adults.
Thanks, Barb! I agree that our own parents' growth helps our healing process -- and is painful in reverse when they won't grow! I will have to check out those videos. I just took a look at his website, and the RRP model he uses looks good - so many ways to help people heal and reparent the inner child!
Hi, Christine. A friend was asking the other day if Christianity could be considered a cult. I'm sure I remember you addressing this question in one of your posts. Could you send me the link?
Thankfully, my childhood trauma did not include religious trauma (which came in adulthood and was self-inflicted). But your explanation is so crystal clear, Christine, of how the two kinds of trauma can come together as a double whammy for kids in religious families. I could feel the inner conflicts. Really fine writing!
Thanks, Chuck! Maybe that's part of why you've been able to so whole-heartedly pursue various spiritual paths in your adult life!
Trigger warning for details of abuse. Taken from the news, I find this a relevant article. https://www.salon.com/2023/09/08/another-christian-influencer-arrested-for-child-abuse-why-conservatives-keep-falling-for-these-cons/