Thanks for giving me a cameo appearance, Christine. The Self or Soul is the real star, and you explain it so well! When we can operate from that part of us most of the time, we can be fully authentic and even grapple with hard emotional stuff (like triggers, disputes, or an evil national government) without losing our balance--well, most of the time anyway. 😊
Thanks for helping provide a framework for thinking...ermm... BEING in Self! Lol. (the language I use revolves so much around thinking!). We don't have to never lose our balance... but regaining equilibrium faster sure helps!
Your perspective on IFS so much more hits the spot for me than do those of many others who, sure, have experienced trauma. Who hasn't? But you bring something incredibly valuable here, a *religious* trauma survivor's perspective.
One of the most helpful remarks you make here concerns belief, and more precisely that bedevilling binary of believing versus not believing. Here you gently offer us a potentially liberatory question: What if it's never been about belief in the first place?
Fundamentalist evangelical Protestant religious authoritarians conditioned me to examine my heart, always, to determine if I was believing "correctly."
I've lost years of my life trying to do something the neuroscience suggests was never possible in the first place to do: control my thoughts and feelings (as what is belief but when those two mental experiences match).
Thank you, Christine, for introducing me to this notion of IFS as being a constraint-release, rather than yet another one of those potentially striving-inspiring, self-shaming, skills-demanding additive models.
I love all of this comment, MK! And the insight about neuroscience (contrary to what CBT thinks we should do!) says. And thoughts + feelings = belief !! Makes so much sense of not being able to force belief, because you can't force your thoughts and definitely not your feelings!
Perfect timing. Right before I read your post I was listening to a podcast and one of the hosts was talking about IFS and mentioned No Bad Parts and a lightbulb went off. I have that book but never finished reading it. Sat down, read your post, found the book. I stopped on p 18 in 2022 and have no idea why. I marked up those first 18 pages soooo much with all kinds of notes. Going to start over tonight and read the whole thing. 🩵
Yayyy! I love when timing lines up like that! And will be fascinating how 2025 you and 2022 you might share the same and different perspectives! Maybe this topic will show up in our podcast interview 😁
Christine, I feel the fire in what you wrote. Self doesn’t need defending or proving. It just keeps shining through the wreckage. Grateful you’re naming it out loud.
Thanks for giving me a cameo appearance, Christine. The Self or Soul is the real star, and you explain it so well! When we can operate from that part of us most of the time, we can be fully authentic and even grapple with hard emotional stuff (like triggers, disputes, or an evil national government) without losing our balance--well, most of the time anyway. 😊
Thanks for helping provide a framework for thinking...ermm... BEING in Self! Lol. (the language I use revolves so much around thinking!). We don't have to never lose our balance... but regaining equilibrium faster sure helps!
Your perspective on IFS so much more hits the spot for me than do those of many others who, sure, have experienced trauma. Who hasn't? But you bring something incredibly valuable here, a *religious* trauma survivor's perspective.
One of the most helpful remarks you make here concerns belief, and more precisely that bedevilling binary of believing versus not believing. Here you gently offer us a potentially liberatory question: What if it's never been about belief in the first place?
Fundamentalist evangelical Protestant religious authoritarians conditioned me to examine my heart, always, to determine if I was believing "correctly."
I've lost years of my life trying to do something the neuroscience suggests was never possible in the first place to do: control my thoughts and feelings (as what is belief but when those two mental experiences match).
Thank you, Christine, for introducing me to this notion of IFS as being a constraint-release, rather than yet another one of those potentially striving-inspiring, self-shaming, skills-demanding additive models.
Here's to our liberation!
I love all of this comment, MK! And the insight about neuroscience (contrary to what CBT thinks we should do!) says. And thoughts + feelings = belief !! Makes so much sense of not being able to force belief, because you can't force your thoughts and definitely not your feelings!
Here's to our liberation, indeed!
Perfect timing. Right before I read your post I was listening to a podcast and one of the hosts was talking about IFS and mentioned No Bad Parts and a lightbulb went off. I have that book but never finished reading it. Sat down, read your post, found the book. I stopped on p 18 in 2022 and have no idea why. I marked up those first 18 pages soooo much with all kinds of notes. Going to start over tonight and read the whole thing. 🩵
Yayyy! I love when timing lines up like that! And will be fascinating how 2025 you and 2022 you might share the same and different perspectives! Maybe this topic will show up in our podcast interview 😁
Our whole interview could be about it if you want. 😳
Christine, I feel the fire in what you wrote. Self doesn’t need defending or proving. It just keeps shining through the wreckage. Grateful you’re naming it out loud.