Hubris: I Just Can't Even.
Reflections on people who think they know what's best for other people.
Hi all - it’s been a busy week in a wonderful way: a visit with a beloved friend from my home state, a mini road trip to Indy for a race that went sideways on me (but my end was so triumphant1!), and then packing my week full of clients. The world keeps turning even while it’s on fire, and I want to hold space here for the things that are so, so terrible, while also allowing us to remember that we can feel joy AND devastation AND numbness AND our own life stressors, all in the same body.
I’ve been thinking about hubris recently — you know, that word that you learn in high school while reading Julius Caesar or some other Shakespeare play. Pride, but super size it.
Perhaps I exhibited the dollar menu version of hubris when I started my race on Saturday too fast and my still-[asymptomatic!]-Covid-affected heart and lungs threw a gigantic temper tantrum at mile 8. I’ll ‘fess up where I need to.
I am often hesitate to come down publicly and firm on an opinion before feeling like I’ve adequately researched a thing. I operate by a philosophy: “I don’t need to be right, but I hate to be wrong.”
I’ve been trying to learn about some of the overarching dynamics of what’s happening in Israel and Gaza. It is obvious that “collateral damage” in the form of innocent civilians — children, women, men — being killed is morally and ethically wrong. To cut off power, food, water supplies that will have terrible consequences on innocent people — wrong. And it seems obvious to most of us that having authoritarian / dictatorial / violent / theocratic leaders, like both the Hamas party and Benjamin Netanyahu, is not an ideal situation (um, to say the least).
It’s important to hold space for tragedy and grief, to the extent that we can tolerate keeping our eyes on it. But I also want to say it’s OKAY to not look because it is so overwhelming. I doubt that you personally have an ability to change anything about the situation, and our evangelical “do-all-the-things, save-all-the-people” mindset can make us feel guilt when there does not need to be any.
But to prescribe solutions? To say what should be done2? How Israel should have responded after Hamas attacked? How to address the fact that Hamas will be perfectly fine using innocent Gazan civilians as a form of protection (see: concerns for collateral damage) whilst hiding among them? How to really address the conditions that are so perilous and deplorable, and trauma so widespread, that people too willing to dehumanize emerge out of them?
How to address the fact that these two people groups, two religions, have been at odds for so, so long and we / they haven’t found a way of living peaceably together yet? How to address the horrible, extensive, intergenerational traumas that both Jews and Palestinians carry in their very bones, that impact the way they see each other and the world?
I just don’t know. And honestly, anyone who thinks they have The Answer to these incredibly complex questions… well, see my headline for my opinion on that.
Sigh.
Okay, now onto a slightly lighter topic, but only because Lyz Lenz makes it funny, because it’s actually extremely alarming…
The new Speaker of the House, Mike Johnson. He’s mild-mannered on the outside but boy oh boy he is a hardcore Religious Right extremist on the inside. Quite the christofascist. Literally.
of Men Yell at Me declared Johnson her “Dingus of the Week”:But what are the beliefs that Johnson holds that is uniting Republicans? Could it be limited government and lower taxes? Could it be democracy and freedom and returning to their ideological roots as the party of Abraham Lincoln?
It’s none of those things. Rather, it’s his righteous commitment to being homophobic and spreading conspiracy theories about the election.
You are right. I am sorry. I am being unfair. It’s also about forcing women to give birth to make the economy better and not funding payouts to 9/11 first responders.
Johnson also believes in covenant marriage, which is like normal marriage but harder to get out of. And if anyone has been divorced, you know that normal marriage is hard enough to end already. I’m assuming his plan includes boldly proclaiming women should need a man’s signature to get mortgages and credit cards.
Mike Johnson is just bigotry with nice hair and glasses.
Straight White American Jesus (
) had an interview with Dr. Matthew Taylor who filled listeners in about Mike Johnson’s alarming connections to the New Apostolic Reformation (NAR). NAR is a dominionist movement perhaps known for their “seven mountain” theology where believers have significant amounts of influence in the 7 aspects of society (religion, family, education, government, media, arts & entertainment, and business).Mike Johnson, in his remarks after being elected, told the representatives,
“I don’t believe there are any coincidences in a manner like this. I believe that scripture, the Bible is very clear that God is the one that raises up those in authority. He raised up each of you, all of us, and I believe that God has ordained and allowed each one of us to be brought here for this specific moment in this time.”
To be fair, he was addressing a room full of Republicans and Democrats. But this election-denying guy has also called into question the votes that came from districts full of people of color, so I’m not sure how far he really extends “each one of us.” He also is a follower of David Barton, a guy who has plainly stated that America was founded as a Christian nation and our laws today should be based on [conservative] Christian principles3.
Back to hubris. I just cannot fathom thinking, as Mike Johnson does, that I was going to personally usher in the rule of God by imposing my belief system on our republic (read: NOT democracy, because they do NOT believe in majority rule!).

I hope that if there’s a god, and if that god is a religious system kind of god, that he or she will mete out whatever punishment is deserved for people who commit the sin of hubris. But before we get there, I really, really, really hope that enough people are waking up to how part of the country wants to take us into a new era where we live in a theocracy and our rights and liberties are limited. And they’re doing it by distracting people about the dumbest shit — pulling the wool right over people’s eyes — while sneakily grabbing power through meek-looking men in glasses who don’t actually think women deserve the same rights as men, or that non-Christians deserve a place in society at all.
My wish for us is this: the eyes to see, the voice to speak, the heart to hold compassion, and the steely courage to press onward.
Usually I have some kind of question/prompt for discussing in the comments, but I don’t even know what to say today. There’s just so much. If you feel that too — or if you DO have something to say — feel free to show up in the comments! Your presence means the world to me. And if you liked this post, would you do me a favor and hit that little heart button or share it with a friend?
I have been listening to some in-depth interviews on the Ezra Klein podcast (Ezra is of Jewish heritage himself, so does have a personal connections to the conflict) to try and learn more. I really appreciate the perspective he and his interviewees are bringing — acknowledging the pain and the incredible moral complexities of what’s going on in Israel and Gaza.
I got much of this info from
recent article about Johnson; please check it out if you haven’t already!
So many parts of this were what I needed to hear, Christine. Thank you! But one of the most sensitive and attuned things anyone ever anywhere has written (pardon my tendency toward hyperbole but I was raised by religious extremists, dontchaknow) is what you wrote about how it is OK sometimes to look away from these gigantic, complex, grief-provoking tragedies if and when we need to, rather than going under into overwhelm and than reflexively striving to hold our own feet to the flame and try to goad ourselves into "I've got to save them all" types of actions, and feeling wracked with guilt if and when we can't seem to summon the energy to try to take such action. So thank you for that.
P.S. I know I owe you an e-mail. Big apologies! I don't know if you saw it, but I left a longish comment (days after the fact, shucks) on your very thought-provoking "Jesus Christ Superstar" post, at least. I'm trying! [cringe cringe cringe] [insert apologetic face emoji] I am out here thinking of you, even if it hasn't been evident in comments on your recent posts and/or in e-mails of late.
Thank you for being who you are and doing what you do. The world is a better place because of you. And congratulations on finishing that race. Wow!
Hubris is an apt description of the fuel to the zeal and the self-righteousness I had when I was yet swimming in NAR adjacent waters (and that I have to check in myself to this day). But it’s also because I witnessed in a sort of gaslighting way the steady radicalization of my neo-charismatic home church in Quebec and likewise of Youth With A Mission that I’m weary, even scared, of the influence of the NAR in American politics. Dominion theology is compelling to those indoctrinated from youth to crave power (like supernatural gifts) and purpose and to do “something big for God.” And its deadly corrosive.
As I’m beginning to heal my nervous system and reclaim my voice that had I shut up as part of my mask to stay safe as an undiagnosed autistic in parachurch and church ministry, I too not merely want to have the eyes to see but the voice to speak and the courage to press on. Thanks for being a source of encouragement on that journey.